Perpetual Suffering...

I actually had planned to keep my posts a little more on the brighter side of life to match with the new ‘cheerful’ theme of the blog. However, this is what you have. Very emo and sad. Perhaps the boredom, the perpetual wet winters and reruns of sci-fi crime dramas have got the better of me. So for now, share your thoughts on this folks! J

You don’t know what suffering or pain is…You don’t know what it’s like to be hurt. It’s not what you feel when somebody you’re going out with leaves you. It’s not when your best friend chooses over you. It’s not when you lose a long loved job.

No, you suffer when you are perpetually scared, constantly fearful of everything in your life. You fear everything at every step of the way. You are fearful that it might turn up against you. That it might turn back and look at you right in the face. Suffering is when you are constantly in pain. When it constantly hurts, physically and mentally, causing acute fatigue and paranoia. When you stay quite all day long and think of stories in your head. You suffer deeply when you can’t put what you feel into words. When you constantly think that you might fail because you haven’t ever really done anything worth remembering for. It’s when you close your eyes and all you can think of are lost opportunities and failed chances. And perpetual suffering comes when you know nothing really is ever going to change. That really there is no hope. People stay the same. Situations change but the suffering of the characters stays the same. So nothing ever really changes. And no matter what you do. There is no peace. It’s this realization that brings perpetual suffering and turmoil. It is this admonition that brings disintegration of the body. You think you know what suffering is? Maybe you do. Maybe you don’t. But you haven’t felt it if you haven’t felt this.